I have a lot of thinking to do. This is unfair to alot of people. Raw emotion is dangerous. I don't do this often!

"Where again will I find ... my lost innocence... my lost memories... my lost childhood." - Devdas

How is it fucking goddamn possible that this week went from amazing (Monday) to utterly irritable (today)... shit what happened to the happy Luis, tired Luis, that dude from FUCKING MONDAY who spent a whole day with his best friend, painting.... what happened to me?

I almost feel like... extinguishing the light of hope for myself. I mean look at me, I was so happy monday.... I actually got to spend time with one of my favorite people.... but then I go into Hill's class today and it all breaks down in the background of my mind. WHY? I think seeing all the asians together tore me to shreds... reminded me of so many things, ya know. Like the cursed power pyramid or something.

It reminded me of how I don't have that kind of group to hang out with. I'm the only latino guy in core with any asian in him, and let alone the only latino guy in core throughout ALL my classes. I'm so alone. I have friends! I have best friends! But where do I go? when stupid things like fucking skin color come to play... I don't have that support, and whatever support I have, it all splits up into different places... I can't go with whatever asian friends I have, I'm not 'one of them', and I don't know if they'd ever let me be one of them. I can't go with white people, QUITE OBVIOUSLY... and trying to talk to whatever 4 or 5 of the latinos there is in core alienates me, because I never see them, they see me as 'other' too... ugh what's happening to me. Why did Juan have to leave? Why will I ALWAYS feel something pushing me away from my friends.... IT ISN'T ME! I can't stand this... it's like, where's my 'asian block' of sorts .... where's the indescribable acceptance?

I'm happy, warm, and hopeful. Yet I'm lonely, distant, and dying. What's wrong with me?

Sometimes I just scream to myself, "What the bloody FUCK did I do that was so goddamn scarring? What do I have to prove for you to fucking speak to me! Why is it so goddamn HARD.... HARD to read, to think, to reflect, about YOU? I dont hate YOU, why do I feel such discord and disdain, STILL? AND WHY DO I GIVE A CRAP!" and why is it that every single time this comes up, I end up falling into a twisted state of sadness?

What's wrong with me? I'm so happy... yet so fucking sad. Enough reading, I have blumblum tommorow. Yeesh. Oh, and after talking to someone for hours ... I've realized, we're all so fucking alike. THAT makes me happy. That and my friends, they make me fucking happy. Yet I'm so pissed off.

Okay I'm BLOGGING, look at meeeeee33e... hahaha only for you. I said I'd leave this thing alone, but nno0oo0.

Someone remind me to update my journal. I really wanna talk about how great Monday was, cuz it was. I don't wanna blog because, my journal is special. My hardcore stuff goes there. This is fluff compared to that. This is daily stuff, the journal ... that's life.

Today after talking to someone ...and then coming home to read some blogs (what, I was bored), I began to seriously think about how many people at school, LJ included!, are ... heh. Manic Depressive. There is something definitely going on within our minds if our moods go from joy to woe in a flash, and I guess I have to face up to the possibility that Ineed some fucking medication at times. I mean people go from bummed to ANGRY to damn happy in such a swift movement, from one to the other, I'm scared. What if I truly am manic depressive? What if all the happiness I have ever cumulated, ESPECIALLY through Peter or Matt or someone... will never be enough? =[ This past Monday, I was so happy... and I'm happy right now damnit!!!! ... but can I ever really know if ... I have limits that my body will not let me surpass? I'm concerned. I need someone to hug me. I'm scared.

Couldn't go to bed without blogging about today. haha, man I'm so fucking sick =[

Today has to be, the single most enlightening day I've had since.... what, early last year? Thankz bro. Today was really tiring, but our conversation, that was amazing. You know I have issues with saying some things too so... I'll just say I'm really really glad we spent alot of time together. yeah that works. hahaha

Anyway I won't be blogging for a while, I'm sick and finals are up all this week. So I just wanna say, I think the Lord put certain people in my path for a reason. Sad, today I realized, if it wasn't for a select few... I would have died. I wish I could put to words how I feel about today btw. It was simply great.

As for everyone else I don't care about... you're not getting my dang outline. XD good luck n stuff, see y'all eventually... which is soon right?

heh anyway... going to finish painting tommorow @ pete's, because I can't do this all myself &^#@^%#@. Still so irritated :-/... anyway, should I go to winter formal?

me: ew does that mean i have to dress up again?
michelle: yup!
me: aww MAN!
michelle: and maybe you'll actually get to dance WITH me this time instead of next

I'm leaning towards going actually >P. If I had something I liked to wear.... haha. I'm so tired, this weekend went by TOO fucking fast. late

"don't be reckless with other peoples hearts, don't put up with people that are reckless with yours." -anon

That's like the worst thing you can ever try to put on me. I'm irritated, I need to paint some more.

People then get mad at ME when they provoke anger in me. Fuck that... that's messed up.

Kiyone333: and you want a pic right?
theeseXayone: and i need a picture of you for it
theeseXayone: haha
theeseXayone: how did you know :D
Kiyone333: i think you told me thursday...sure thing :-) that's no big favor..that's an honor
theeseXayone: .... awww
Kiyone333: i'll bring one monday
Kiyone333: thanks :-)
theeseXayone: :-[
theeseXayone: quit makin me blush

Everyone gimme your pictures! I've raided Miller's wall btw. . . I'm trying as hard as I can not to forget anybody. I'm tired of painting. I wanna talk to Tim already, too. I can't wait to get all the pics in. Oh and ... no, that's it for today. yay

theeseXayone: am i cute?
OoPeek A Boo11: hahah
theeseXayone: ;-)
OoPeek A Boo11: yea adorable cute
theeseXayone: am i sweet?
OoPeek A Boo11: yup
theeseXayone: am i krazy?
OoPeek A Boo11: yes
theeseXayone: am i funny?
OoPeek A Boo11: you try to be
theeseXayone: lol i so do 8-)
theeseXayone: am i psycho?
OoPeek A Boo11: just as psycho as i am
theeseXayone: o no... dats not good
theeseXayone: lol
theeseXayone: am i daring
theeseXayone: ?
OoPeek A Boo11: mentally
theeseXayone: am i a good person?
OoPeek A Boo11: yes
theeseXayone: would you..? q's
theeseXayone: hug me?
OoPeek A Boo11: if i wasn't so busy
OoPeek A Boo11: hehe
theeseXayone: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: jk
OoPeek A Boo11: yes
theeseXayone: W00T!
theeseXayone: miss me if i was gone?
OoPeek A Boo11: yeah, who else would keep me entertained with my stupid games
theeseXayone: listen to my problems?
OoPeek A Boo11: i try to whenever i can
theeseXayone: hug me if i cried?
OoPeek A Boo11: yes
theeseXayone: be a good friend..?
OoPeek A Boo11: i always try to be
theeseXayone: WOULD YOU..?
theeseXayone: Ever go out with me?
OoPeek A Boo11: no because, i wouldnt wanna put anything on the line
theeseXayone: Kiss me ((Really))?
OoPeek A Boo11: probably, esp on the cheek or forehead
theeseXayone: Marry me if u could?
theeseXayone: wait... this has been sorta answered >P
OoPeek A Boo11: lol
theeseXayone: ever talk bad about me if we broke up?
OoPeek A Boo11: nope
theeseXayone: how well do you know me? q's
theeseXayone: whens my birthday?
OoPeek A Boo11: august
theeseXayone: august wut
theeseXayone: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: 17!
theeseXayone: =-O wtf
theeseXayone: u got it!
OoPeek A Boo11: hahhah
OoPeek A Boo11: yes!
OoPeek A Boo11: i remembered
OoPeek A Boo11: go me
theeseXayone: go you!
theeseXayone: hhow old am i?
theeseXayone: ...
OoPeek A Boo11: 17
OoPeek A Boo11: duh
theeseXayone: what skool... nm next q
OoPeek A Boo11: haha
theeseXayone: do i have any sibs? -> names?
OoPeek A Boo11: sister, alondra
OoPeek A Boo11: brother, eddie
theeseXayone: wowza
OoPeek A Boo11: hahah
theeseXayone: who is my most current ex?
theeseXayone: lol... just TRY IT
OoPeek A Boo11: you don't talk about it!
OoPeek A Boo11: i have no idea
theeseXayone: hahaha
theeseXayone: Lilian, 9th
theeseXayone: ay next q
theeseXayone: who am i crushing on/dating?
OoPeek A Boo11: probably someone asian
theeseXayone: LOL
theeseXayone: oooh thats not good enough
OoPeek A Boo11: i'm sooo right
OoPeek A Boo11: hahah
theeseXayone: hahahaha
OoPeek A Boo11: of course it is
theeseXayone: ill let it slide
OoPeek A Boo11: haha
theeseXayone: favorite color?
OoPeek A Boo11: wait, so who is it?
OoPeek A Boo11: if that's not good enough
theeseXayone: *ahem* next q...
OoPeek A Boo11: blue
theeseXayone: favorite color?
theeseXayone: k!
theeseXayone: who is my best friend?
OoPeek A Boo11: peter
OoPeek A Boo11: then matt
theeseXayone: lucky number?
OoPeek A Boo11: i dunno...7?
theeseXayone: ugh
theeseXayone: go die
theeseXayone: hahaha
OoPeek A Boo11: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: woo
theeseXayone: what is my worst subject?
OoPeek A Boo11: umm
OoPeek A Boo11: math?
theeseXayone: ...
theeseXayone: ugh this isnt fun
theeseXayone: ur not supposed to know!
OoPeek A Boo11: cuz i'm right!!
OoPeek A Boo11: hahah
theeseXayone: best subject?
OoPeek A Boo11: english/writing of some sortr
theeseXayone: :-)
theeseXayone: favorite animal?
OoPeek A Boo11: uh
theeseXayone: >)
OoPeek A Boo11: bunny?
theeseXayone: ...uh
OoPeek A Boo11: gangster buns!
theeseXayone: DAMNIT
theeseXayone: next q
OoPeek A Boo11: lol
theeseXayone: favorite sport?
theeseXayone: >P
OoPeek A Boo11: soccer?
theeseXayone: .... whoa wtf
theeseXayone: ew no
theeseXayone: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: football
theeseXayone: basketball of football
theeseXayone: ya
theeseXayone: *or
theeseXayone: fav tv show?
theeseXayone: this is hard
OoPeek A Boo11: boston public?
OoPeek A Boo11: and lucy
theeseXayone: ooo nice try
theeseXayone: who's line
theeseXayone: !
theeseXayone: and THEN lucy and THEN boston
theeseXayone: hahaha
OoPeek A Boo11: eh next guess
theeseXayone: fav song/songs?
theeseXayone: uh... maximum of 3
theeseXayone: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: no next
OoPeek A Boo11: that's too hard and you know it
theeseXayone: no do it
theeseXayone: do it!
theeseXayone: name ONE then :-)
OoPeek A Boo11: our lady peace - somewhere out there
theeseXayone: no ur cheating
theeseXayone: another
OoPeek A Boo11: ah!
theeseXayone: cheaters neverrrrrrr prosper
theeseXayone: ...alot
theeseXayone: haha
OoPeek A Boo11: staind-outside
OoPeek A Boo11: or something by linking park
theeseXayone: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: linkin park - my december
theeseXayone: too bad its not linking
OoPeek A Boo11: haha yeah i know
theeseXayone: w00t
theeseXayone: okay u pass
theeseXayone: haha
theeseXayone: favorite music group?
theeseXayone: ...
OoPeek A Boo11: linkin park
theeseXayone: :-P
theeseXayone: who am i q's
theeseXayone: what tv star do i most remind you of?
theeseXayone: o_O
OoPeek A Boo11: hmm
OoPeek A Boo11: wait gotta think
theeseXayone: haha okay
OoPeek A Boo11: james van der beek cuz all thru dawson's creek the first season, he was so innocent and just searching to be loved
theeseXayone: whoa whered that come from
theeseXayone: hahaha
theeseXayone: thats weird.. but koo
OoPeek A Boo11: haha
theeseXayone: what song would u dedicate to me?
OoPeek A Boo11: was and always will be lifehouse - somehwere in between
theeseXayone: aww... i didnt know that was a dedication
theeseXayone: why?
OoPeek A Boo11: cuz you're still searching and i know you'll get thru it
theeseXayone: :-[ awww
theeseXayone: i love ya mush.
theeseXayone: anyway
theeseXayone: what famous person do i most resemble?
OoPeek A Boo11: gangster bunz
OoPeek A Boo11: and shut up
OoPeek A Boo11: he's a famous person
theeseXayone: ....
theeseXayone: not 'thing' but 'person'
theeseXayone: you cheater
OoPeek A Boo11: next q
OoPeek A Boo11: i'm geting sleepy
OoPeek A Boo11: and i still wana sing to u
theeseXayone: haha ok
OoPeek A Boo11: hurry! hehe
theeseXayone: a few more!
theeseXayone: if you could...
theeseXayone: give me a new name..?
OoPeek A Boo11: nick
theeseXayone: whyz that
OoPeek A Boo11: just cuz that's wut i wanna name my boy lol
theeseXayone: hahaha
OoPeek A Boo11: and i love that name
theeseXayone: hook me up with someone (real) who would it be?
OoPeek A Boo11: meg
theeseXayone: do one thing with me what would it be?
OoPeek A Boo11: watch a sunrise
OoPeek A Boo11: and talk
theeseXayone: drop me one piece of advice it would be?
OoPeek A Boo11: don't put your friends before you, because they might not always be there, but you will ALWAYS be there for yourself
theeseXayone: just a few last q's...
theeseXayone: what do u love about me?
OoPeek A Boo11: your persistence and you don't give up too easily
theeseXayone: what do u hate about me? (seriously)
OoPeek A Boo11: your need for constant attention
theeseXayone: what is my best quality?
OoPeek A Boo11: your writing improved
theeseXayone: oh?
OoPeek A Boo11: to me it has
OoPeek A Boo11: but i'm no expert
theeseXayone: thats a big compliment
theeseXayone: coming from a poet
OoPeek A Boo11: i'm glad
theeseXayone: IF u could change one thing about me it would be?
OoPeek A Boo11: don't forget who your true friends are because sometimes, you overlook the best ones because of others who have distanced themselves from u
theeseXayone: we always want what we dont have.
OoPeek A Boo11: yeah i know
OoPeek A Boo11: trust me
theeseXayone: what is your honest opinion about me?
theeseXayone: *last one btw*
theeseXayone: !
OoPeek A Boo11: you're a good guy who will one day find what you're looking for and then some

Haven't done one of those in a while huh Michelle? XD That ruled. I finally wrote in the infiniteprofile again today. I'm having problems dealing with what I want to be 'pending confrontations'. Peter says I've changed in that respect, I never really was too shy to not go up to somebody for anything. heh how wrong was HE huh? lol. Anyway, painting all weekend. Gamecube all weekend. Wondering wtF happened to my n64, for a bit this weekend. I wrote about THAT a few days ago so, whatever, no need to say anything else. I'm glad I talked to Mush, even though some of those q's were totally cheat-style. Do I really look like Mashimaro?

Fade. Memories overtaking me..

... now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface I am scratching
is the bed that I have made...

But I never meant to fade.. away

I refuse to paint anymore today. FUCKIN SHIT DUDE! So Peter came over and we painted for fucking fuck 4 hours >(. We actually talked alot more seriously than usual... it was koo. I mean with most everyone, I maintain a certain level of surface comfortability, and out of nowhere we just started talking hardcore. About several people, metco, etc. Yeh anywayz I got the hardest fucking Super Mairo Sunshine Shine (star) because he knew how to get it, hahaha. Fucking FINALLY!

The rest of the week will be so slow and painful, so much work, but whatever... I'm just glad I'll be seeing him, Julez, Didi and Angela over the weekend. I'm gonna make him watch Devdas too, heeeelll yeahh.... ahhh. Crap, I have hwk to do. And according to Peter, I have a game system to retreive. Yeah I never forgot, I've just been total non-confrontational about ALOT of people and things lately. Work time!

Oh, so Metco's unofficially over. So are a lot of things based off of what ran through my head in there.

I don't think I'll ever get to see most of the people in there again. That really sucks ass. I don't think I'll see Michelle again and that REALLY sucks. And yea I may see her or someone from the class walking by but is that really seeing someone? I won't get to hang out with most of them at all anymore, and I don't feel I got the chance to. It really sucks.

Ugh. I'm being overworked too. I have to paint my goddamn ass off the rest of the week. Thankfully, Peter will be with me, and I won't fucking die of boredom. Ugh and I have core outlines to do and fucking FINALS are next week and I have SO MUCH TO DO. Yeah, I'm kind of pissed off but whatever =P. I hate how core is so... unbalanced too. I mean wtf, I'll ALWAYS have Linn, while some people have easy sides of core CONSTANTLY? I'm telling you, I'm not gonna take this lightly. I'm already bogged down by all this crap...

... and the mere fact that I keep reading my last two blogs over and over, makes it harder for me to relax. I'm all over the place. I don't ditch, I do my work, why are other asses getting off easy this year?

Psykdelicchik21: youve exposed me
Psykdelicchik21: and ruined me
theeseXayone: hahahahaha
theeseXayone: GOOD
Psykdelicchik21: BIG BURP
Psykdelicchik21: *pushes it in luis' face*
theeseXayone: too bad i ran away
theeseXayone: 8-)
Psykdelicchik21: um nope
theeseXayone: uh ya
theeseXayone: look how far i ran
theeseXayone: ___________________________________
theeseXayone: taht much
theeseXayone: haha im gonna blog THAT in MY blog
theeseXayone: ull be finished
Psykdelicchik21: whateevr dude
Psykdelicchik21: IM BURPING AGAIN
Psykdelicchik21: burppppp
theeseXayone: how about NO
Psykdelicchik21: pooooffffff
theeseXayone: (^% !765Z1&^%@&%$!%$
theeseXayone: i hope george bush kisses u
Psykdelicchik21: been there done that
theeseXayone: ....
theeseXayone: no wonder ur breath stinks
Psykdelicchik21: shut up
Psykdelicchik21: it does not

I won't see her ever again after today... just watch. No I'm not talking about Molly either. heh. Im so utterly stressed, I don't know how I'm gonna do all this work so soon. But whatever... I get to go to Peter's house! Some relief, right?

Do you blog for an audience, or yourself?

I have this bias against people who go with the crowd, and mold themselves according to the mere thoughts that come from other people. Yeah, you heard me. The reason I say this though is, because I'd never really come to terms with the inner 'fraud' that is me. Or maybe fraud' the wrong word, whatever.

One of the worst habits I have is being guilty of this bullshit! and I've known about it for a long ass time. It's because I detest that part of me so much that I really try to tell others not to follow that type of thinking - even if I come off as a hypocrite. I mean I know there's so many people I've told not to do this or that, when really I should be doing what I preach or whatever... but really, how the hell am I supposed to give the 'right' kind of advice on things when I'm in need of advice too half the time?

Yeah so, I'm guilty of this molding from others, ONLY in my writing. There's been several times when I'm typing something, and it comes into my head, "What if HE or SHE reads this... what will he/she think of me?" and I've been trying really hard not to give a shit about others in that way. I mean, it's a terrible thing, letting others mold your own fucking opinion. Who gives a rats ass if somebody thinks differently of you because of something you wrote? I end up editing my blog sometimes, rare though, but I do it. I get camera-shy, I want approval, whatever. Something I have to work on. Why do I hold back so much, to the point where my views and opinions are blurred among the masses, FOR THE SAKE OF APPROVAL? Damn, sometimes, it's like I haven't moved very much.

But I have. I've moved alot, I just have relapses, where I want to be accepted by someone, someone who doesn't even matter in my life. How pathetic is that, really? I have moved alot though, I DO have my own opnions, and perhaps the reason it doesn't seem that way is because, the only place I'm eloquent in explaining myself is through the keyboard...

...and even then, I catch myself, thinking too much about others and what they think. You notice a few blogs down, how TIRED I am of people fucking with me? TIRED. One thing I have to keep in mind is, I have to stop letting them fuck with me. Without being too blunt, yeah.... we'll see. I do hold my own most of the time, I don't regurgitate what people want to hear from me, or what 'should' be said... I'm not a drone, a follower, and I *hate* followers, and I ***hate*** when I show signs of doing it myself. eh... Anyway, where were Meg and Peter today? Today was blah... and so is this entry.

But I'm not gonna edit it this time, heh.

Psykdelicchik21: so how psycho do u think tim is?
Thee seXay onE: uhhh
Thee seXay onE: probably 67% psycho

Talked to Molly for hours today. Today was relatively okay, it was REAL good when Nicole was here XD... and uh, we were gonna paint, but cmon, with a fucking Gamecube around, who wants to fuck around with tempera? hahahaha... wow. She rules. My sister's growing up so fast.... and advanced thankx to homies from the Paden clique (in this case Molly n Pinki) for geting my sister some real gear to wear. I wanna wear some fucking indian clothes too =[

I was a little bummed out saturday, at first I thought it was some type of mood swing... and that I might truly be manic depressive, but naw. I couldn't find a reason at the moment for feeling so...sad, but it went away, I guess. I wanna elaborate, but nothing's coming to me... so whatever. I'm okay. It'll come to me sometime, right?

It was until this afternoon that I was feeling so BORED and stuff, I really wanna know what the fuck happened to talking to / hangin' with him... heh. I swear it pops into my mindframe at the most random of times. Thankx Molly! haha... ugh. No really, am I scary or something? I've never met a person in my entire life who was so damn ... confusing. Intriguing? well duh but... I'd like to do something other than... nothing. I usually find someone to 'talk' to me about this when it gets in my head, but I don't need to I think. I can do things on my own now... weird no? One thing I can't do alone though, is find a way to close this damn 'intimidation' thing I have going on. I mean who the fuck in this entrie damn planet is so intimidated by somebody for SO long when they don't hate them or anything? Well I know a few people...

heh I started to rant, oops. Check the newest member of core babies erryone, and JOIN YO!! I hope Nicole's pet project gets huge success. Click the link on the right side of ur screen. haha.. Tell ur friends, and yeah, later.

oh ... on a lighter note. I saw the movie Chicago with Jacob, his mommy, and his big sister, Katherine. Good times, good times.

The Depressed State that is Ena Nicole Aquino Suarez a.k.a. Nic.
This is what I think about when I'm consumed with that feeling that's become so familiar ...

dis·joint·ed adj 1 a : being thrown out of orderly function b : lacking coherence or orderly sequence 2 : separated at or as if at the joint -- dis·joint·ed·ly adv -- dis·joint·ed·ness n

1 : Whenever my heart feels broken I hate having to "cope." You just have to move on. Don't let it bother you so much. You'll get over it. He's an asshole anyway. You deserve SO much better. They say all these things, make you feel like you're being weak just because all you want to do is cry -- cry and let yourself heal in your own way.

2 : Whenever my heart feels confused I just want to run away because I don't want to make a decision. I don't want to "figure it out." I don't want to make the wrong choice. I just want to leave and never come back.

3 : Whenever I feel torn away from my heart, like I can no longer feel anything, I despise the world. I think that's the worse. Not feeling like I can feel ANYTHING and yet I feel hate. I can't stand that. When that happens I just want to disappear.

* * *

My heart is not broken, confused or gone. Yet, I want to cry, run away, and disappear all at the same time. What's wrong with me Louie?

Yeah so I'm goddamn upset that I'm scared to talk to several girls right now. I feel like I'll be pushed away further if I even IM anyone so, whatever... not feeling good about this. =[

So I'm distracting myself with good things. I've decided to give a nice proverbial "fuck you" to all the negative vibes I've been surrounded by, by being VERY blunt about how I feel throughout the day. I'm so sick of people trying to destroy my morale. I won't care anymore if I don't get the goddamn hug when I say hi anymore, or that someone else gets lavished with attention. Yeah, I'm self-defeated here, but whatever. I'm buying a half-page ad for the senior yrbook... I can't believe I wanna waste $100 on something like it, but I am. I guess I do want to, but I can't justify myself. I wanna have several pics in it, of friends, so fucking gimme pics! I have alot but... well I'll see what I put in it. I'm also buying a senior shout-out, and instead of trying to be nice and please everyone by saying something general, I'll specify my shout-out to just one person. And if people don't like that and give me a crooked look, then once again, FUCK YOU! hahaha

Yeah so. Gonna paint this weekend, obviously NOT going out heh, and soon Peter will come and paint with me, which means time to chill, watch tv, and throw paint at each other. Man... I have to clean my room for that too. Sad, I'd only clean it if it was him coming over, or someone I feel as 'close' to... I guess that's normal.

Also, I've been meaning to tell you if you could give me the piece of paper you wrote that poem to me on... I seem to have forgotten to ask earlier, and I dunno. I'd like it. My mouth feels so dry, my head feels so heavy, my soul feels so anxious... wth is wrong with me, this was only the first week back! wow... it's already over.

I wanna live life... and never be cruel...
and I wanna live life... and be good, to you
and I wanna fly... and never come down...
and live my life... and have friends around.
We never change.. do we... no no.
We never learn.. do we. So I wanna live...

Today again, was a very good day. Until Metco, again.

My words may never be enough, and my actions may never sway your mind, but I'm sorry. It hurts like hell to know I'm that to you, that it's someone like me that has scarred you... and it may make no difference to you, but I care about you, and whatever has to be dealt with in order to move forward from this point, I'm there. I wish I could've hugged so, soo bad, to help you feel better, but... I don't know how you feel, and might never will. But I'm here. Always will be.

I may be pushed away constantly, I may be treated on a totally distant level, and I may never be allowed to get close, but I'm here. I just care about you like that.

honeylette111: You approach two talking doors. One door leads to the City of Truth, while the other door leads to the City of Liars. You do not know which door is which. You are able to ask only one question to determine which door is which. The door that leads to the City of Liars always speaks lies, while the door that leads to the City of Truth always speaks the truth. You want to go to the City of Truth. What question do you ask to determine which door leads to the City of Truth

Auto response from Thee seXay onE: :-\

honeylette111 signed off at 8:00:05 PM.

If I could speak I would but... no. So this is wut went down today:

Thee seXay onE: im so undefined right now
Thee seXay onE: i had the best day at skool
Thee seXay onE: until metco
Thee seXay onE: that shot me doooooown
Thee seXay onE: =/
Psykdelicchik21: really
Psykdelicchik21: why best day hmmmmmmmmm?
Thee seXay onE: it was just so... positive
Thee seXay onE: like i noticced
Thee seXay onE: if my morning isnt good
Thee seXay onE: my day sucks.
Psykdelicchik21: oh really
Thee seXay onE: and i have peter and ppl right in the morning so it rules
Thee seXay onE: and i got an a on my kant essay, FOR ONLY 3 PAGES
Thee seXay onE: and jen finally came
Thee seXay onE: hahaha
Thee seXay onE: and i got to play with michelles koolio koala!!!!!!
Thee seXay onE: and i dunno.... its like i dont mind life at all right now
Psykdelicchik21: oh sweet

And I walked Nicole home, that was the koolest thing. I wish I had more to say, but I can't bring myself to... finish this sente...n...

Just what I thought.

Today would rule, so it did. hahaha... ahh. It's always so refreshing and revitalizing to see the faces of my friends early in the morning, they make me look forward to wasting the day with them so bad xD. No really, if the first class (in this case art) doesn't make me feel uplifted, the rest of the day sucks ass. I gotta thank my art table for that, Peter, Robert, and Taryn. w00t~! I can't wait to fuckin' PAINT! lol

Seeing faces I haven't seen in a wihle is wicked kool, too. Especially when most of them saw me first and decided to mug me, right Rody =P. I saw Nicole! ahhh... ah. If everyday is as good and 'up' as today, high school has no limits to what I can do within its confines. People aren't hell Sartre >_<, they're the source of life! heh... how cheesy was that.

Today however had it's downfalls, since I had to walk with balloons most of the day, which were for Jen but NO, she's too kool to go to skool. =/ so yeah, and adding to the fact that I have 5 metco meetings left, really it means, 5 more times that I actually get to see Michelle, heh. And you know it wouldn't be such a depressing hting to me if she wasn't such a damn good friend, and a psycho I can't help but wanna chill with. But whatever, if there's one thing I learned from The Stranger (which I wanna write about), it's that people who just give up and don't care about things they KNOW they should care about... isn't the type of person I could ever be.

Well, not anymore. Not anymore. aesthetics time...

...The memories I keep are from a time like then
I put 'em on paper so I could come back to them
Someday I'm hopin' to close my eyes and pretend
That this crumpled up paper can be perfect again

eh last thought. Doesn't it seem like... we both just recently FINALLY found who we were looking for? You alwayz had them around, though... eh. =]

man I must lay off the coffee... I just pissed off 2 people within an hour... damnit. I'm not me tonight, or maybe I just don't know how to play a game and I end up fucking up, eh. =/ sorry!

Psykdelicchik21: i love those e-mails where it says "molly. enlarge ur penis by 3 inches in a week" or "molly. lose 14 pounds in 2 day or "molly, have u been injured wrongfully by a medical company?"
theeseXayone: lmao
Psykdelicchik21: there soooooooo stupid
Psykdelicchik21: its like
theeseXayone: i love the ones that ask me 'hey ljsexay, do you want to reduce cramp pain?'
Psykdelicchik21: dude- am i really gonna click that? who would be a big enuf loser to click it
Psykdelicchik21: little did i know- that pinki did

hahahahahahahhaaha. Okay right now I wanna go back to skool. good times await... I hope.

x g0t nic x: god i love these pics of me
x g0t nic x: hahah
Thee seXay onE: lol.... wait, who's arrogant?
Thee seXay onE: hmm?
x g0t nic x: haha
x g0t nic x: me, duh!
Thee seXay onE: w00t!
Thee seXay onE: i like arrogance if you are worthy of using it
Thee seXay onE: so go ahead - tell me how good you look.
x g0t nic x: i look so good, i can make the sky cry out of sheer joy of having the honor of looking down upon me

okay okay! I'm leaving... hahahaha. Gotta update my quote page one day.

Sektor75: you always look mean

Tired... @.@

Spent the day w/ Jamie and Angela! hahaha... awesome. Starbucks all afternoon. Did alot of crap, I can't beileve how lazy we all are, fucking doing our homework all at once at Starbucks.. ugh. Several people came by, Steve, Garret, Errison, etc. Declined offer to go to boba since I really need to finish my lit essay. AND I LOVE THE STRANGER~!

Didn't get to call Jen today for her b-day... *sigh* but whatever, I sent her the email, I'm getting balloons in the morning, life will be okay! School will suck ass, as usual. Except I'll see all of my friends again and THAT, is the only reason I'll bother to go. I can't wait really... hehehehehheh... >_>

can't I?

ahhh it's sunday already! good timing for everything... I can't sleep. hehe neither can SOME people...

Tommorow will be full of last minute hwk, friends, and maybe even some rest. What was break? It's a nasty ass blur... heh. I left school on a HIGHNOTE~!, and thought I could carry that on towards break. It seemed to work, I guess. Not seeing Peter or Rody at all really sucks, but I talked to them lots, so meh. I guess that goes for several people too. heh... anyway. I went out alot, got distracted tons... it seems like everything will be as good as it was before we left :-). But... hopefully not as boring in my moments alone.

I'm kinda mad that I didn't get to see some people I wanted to see, but being mad does nothing, right? haha... ugh. I was supposed to see alot of people, but instead I saw alot of 'other' people so I'm happy. Was gonna contact Tim about seeing him but he said he'd get to me, so meh. I'm too dreadfully tired to do much right now but say that break was kool, I need a car, I think Nicole is hot, Michelle's a psycho, Matt ate nasty fattening shit, and oh yeah....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 I love ya.

Tired of nothingness... I'm unpleased with my writing, unpleased with how utterly worthless these free days seem to be like. I get sleep, I see people, I live life, but I'm unpleased with it. I serve no purpose nowadays, and that aggravates me. Hate to say it but, school gave me purpose. Gave me excuses to ache and pain and to be happy. I'm at a standstill right now, I guess. If I had another job that'd be fine, if I had a goddamn car that would be best, but... whatever. Tired of nothingness.

Tired of people... I was talkin to Malalai, got to thinking about how I'm so pissed off, deep down inside at people... if I put effort into people and they don't so jackshit, yet STILL want to cling onto me for seflish reasons, then fuck people man! I was a fool, thinking if you showed people that you were willing to tough it out with them, that they'd see that and have some reciprocal feelings for you. Doesn't work that way. . . so I guess in a way, I need some distance from those people, those... selfish, cruel people, that I give such a damn about. Perhaps then I'll know who sticks and so slides, ya know? And whatever, I have people that I know care about me. Why do I waste time trying to prove myself to others, when I have friends that I don't need to 'work' for? Tired of people.

Tired of break... I need things to keep busy or I rot in the depths of hell, mental hell. These past 3 weeks have left me to vegetate, and i may have wanted that, but I don't anymore!!!! I hate doing nothing, and I hate having to scower the world to FIND something to do. Heh... tired of break.

But I don't really wanna go back to school.

But a little tired... tired of people trying to derail my state of mind and send me crashing down, supposed 'bringing back to reality'... I swear it's not like I'm making my friends of any kind do anything for me. Why feel the need to fuck with me?

Conclusion...

only one person it seems... has the power to cheer me up in an instant. Quite the powerful person... I'm afraid that if I base myself too much on our friendship, I may end up going for a loop.... but whatever, I don't do that shit.

I'm just happy you're here.

I got r3anim4ted so to speak today, I fell asleep in the car to Linkin Park.... ahh my homies. I kept listening to the lyrics, and you know I love em, but... they seemed to stick out to me more than usual. Maybe cuz they alwayz seem to express my feelings for me, and today... I dunno, I came to a conclusion about my relationship with people. I gotta add some lyrics or stuff to my profile. You ever feel like you're made to be a puppet for others to throw around and use at their expense/will? Yeah... I'm bored.

This just in: I have found my own koala. I need a name for him tho... cuz Stitch is kool, but MASHIMARO!!!!!!.... he's gangsta.

To change is to prosper. To prosper is to Evolve. To evolve is to transcend. To Transcend is to reach destiny. Deep inside of us all, is the will to grasp destiny, we must merely find the will within.

Chris J. Godwin
The Will

BoR3d... ugh

One thing lingering in my head is how hard it is to be honest with people. It means letting down the pride, right? Not a very easy thing to do, personally.

It keeps comin into my mind, those things in life that you do that are/were stupid, out of nowhere. yeah, the REGRETS in life, how the hell do you ever make others forget them?

I guess you can't, but whatever. We're all young, naive, stupid, and will always do things that will make others say 'WTF?!?!'... just have to live it down and say yeah... I did that. Kinda dumb of me huh? Yeah, I was young, naive, and stupid.

I added my deviantart account to my links section, since I'm one of the best fuckin' graphic artists around... hahaha. Just to see if people like the things I can do with fotoshop 6. I just added one called r3gression, it's really nice IMO...

STILL bored. Gonna call up the pplz... those usuals. Noone new, but that's expected or everybody right? Stay in your group and you'll be juuuuust fine... heh.

OoPeek A Boo11: yeah
OoPeek A Boo11: i'm okay with everything
OoPeek A Boo11: i may complain, i may cry, i may yell
OoPeek A Boo11: but in the end, it's MY life. .. i can't take that for granted

dunno why but... I didn't even ASK for inspiration that time. It takes me days to say something that makes sense, at least in my head... but she just kinda said it outta nowhere on survey night. Dunno how I'm feeling right now, but... eh, I'm okay. NO, then she hits me with her own survey question, made me think too much, on winter break no less! egh...

This week has been a virtual waste... didn't see much of people with exception of New Years and the day after.... but even then, I wanna see ppl again, I like being social, I CRAVE people in a way, but... no car and no people willing to do anything in a sense, makes me vegetate even when I'm full of energy. feh...

Gamecube will fix my ails... right. XD

1. Full Name - luis hector teran jr.
2. What color underwear right now? - uh... green w/ white
3. Song that youre listening to right now? - fade - staind
4. Last 4 digits of your cell phone # ? - umm 7968
5. Last thing you ate - enchiladas!!!
6. If u were crayon, wut color would you be and why? - Slate, BECAUSE, im a little blue alwayz... but like grey, im almost in between the good (white) and black (bad)
7. Where would you want your honeymoon? - uhhh somewhere near the beach
8. What's the weather like? Breezy
9. Who do you think of when you hear "crazy" ? - Rody, and really, me too. Let's not forget MICHELLE

do you like the person who sent u this survey?
Thee seXay onE: ...
Thee seXay onE: well?
Thee seXay onE: lol
OoPeek A Boo11: sure
Thee seXay onE: haha thats such a terrible answer
OoPeek A Boo11: hahaha

10. What's your perfect "lazy day" - uhh... being in bed watching tv, then playing games, then sleeping in the shower, then sleeping on my bed again, then eating alot
11. Favorite soft drink? Ew soda... it's all about water. and boba. omg... thirsty
12. Last movie you saw at home - Lilo n Stitch
13. Last movie you saw at the theatre - Harry Potter 2
14. Favorite days? - ppls birthdays, nothing like a bday to see how much love u got around you
15. What / who causes you to be shy, and why - when ppl approach me... and i wasnt ready for it
16. What kind of movies relate most to you? - mysteries.
17. Hugs or kisses - BOTH, affection rules
18. What / who makes you mad - not being understood pisses the crap out of me at first... and being manipulated too
19. What / who cheers you up the fastest - being shown that i have real friends who care (so ditto to Mush)
20. What / who scares you the most - heh, confrontations, even tho i push myself into them, so that i wont be scared anymore
21. What / who is hardest to overcome - i dunno, last year as a whoile was the hardest thing ever for me to 'overcome'. and as for people........hahahahaha, no. i guess the hardest ppl to 'overcome' are those that you never 'overcome'
22. What / who is your greatest achievement outside of skool - don't have any
23. Who knows the most about you without 'knowing' you - Whoever reads my blog and yet... doesn't talk to me on a regular basis o_O

Friday nite surveys are koo.

hmmm is this working?

Man and then Juan signs online after forever... freakin weird year already.

OKAY! I've written. Check it out on AIM, yo. =]

Fuckin' I'm soo tired and yet so.. restless, ughhhh... I'm very very content with the way my life is right now, there's bound to be ups and downs, alwayz, but I won't let shit kill me anymore. Even better I won't make things do it to me either.. w00t! New Years was very very fun, spent it w/ some of my best friends. Jenny picked me and Meg up and took us to her place where we met up with Matt and... yeah that's right, AMY MADOLE @_@ and it was trippy, but I missed her so it was aight... we all went out to eat, then got drinks and played Mario Party, again haha, watched movies played games etc etc... shit.

I couldn't sleep all night because... I kept thinking about what's become of me. I looked to my right, everyone was asleep, and I felt so old right then and there... God, I've been through so much now that whenever I think about it, it makes me happy... because I've SURVIVED THE WORST mang, the worst. I thought about everybody in my life that has become a part of me.. and made me who types this before you. I'm so happy for every single moment from the past year... 2002 will always remain in my heart and mind. and in my blog and such, hahahaaha.

We then woke up a short few hours later, went out to BOWL which kicked ass, then ate, then... crap I forgot. Oh, saw Dogma, which I love because it's a Kevin Smith film. Love him... and it was such a nice time. Jenny's so bony... haha. Having Amy around brought back some strange memories... since we've always had a turbulent relationship. She bit my @$$. yeah. I have a bruise on the left cheek =[. ANYWAY... kraziest new years ever to end the kraziest year ever.

Can't keep the past in my mind though, it'll slow my ass down in life, and slow ANYONE down, so I'll just keep blogging, writing in my journal, and march forward.

I got msged by him on the 31st, and I had a freakin heart attack when I gout out of the shower to see it... hahaha yeah. I wrote some stuff in my 'real' journal about it, so I don't feel like I have to say any more about that, except that it's kool and made me happy and stuff, but I just have to write myself a memo about it... and that's that hey,

Get Ready.

Anywho... I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GREAT NEW YEARS =], or as Peter An would say... L337 NEW YEAR!!!!!!! W00T W00T! XD

heh... I still haven't written shit.

x g0t nic x: louie you can't do this to me
x g0t nic x: PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!
x g0t nic x: LOUIE
Thee seXay onE: nicole you gotta learn patience.. ;-)
x g0t nic x: TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!
x g0t nic x: TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME! TELL ME!

Anyone wanna give it a shot? She got an 84%...

... I survived and am still alive... ahhhh two-thousand and two... you were the year dude! The year... for everything. God I'm so tired, too much partyin', I guess once I'm done.... reflecting (AGAIN~!!!!!)... then I can type. I survived...