2/29/2004

Now Playing: Dashboard Confessional - Hands Down

Joey and I stayed up until 6.30am this morning just talking. It was an awesome time. Mayhaps it was one of those leap year once-in-4-years phenomenas, because it was that odd, yet that nice and special [even though we're dumb and argued half the time]. In fact it made me kinda wanna write about it.. it was that cool =).

and THAT my friends, was the coolest thing to happen this week. Oh and guess what Matt!! I told him about what BNU did, and he's officially disgusted 8-). I told him if he ever tried pulling that off, I'd have to kill him. We've signed a contract. I ... think[?] I'm safe.

2/27/2004

Now Playing: Ashley slowly losing sanity next to me

Living Well Is the Best Revenge.

At this moment in time, three things are very very clear to Luis.

- I haven't had such a good time here at school in a very long time. Without drinks =-0
- I have a great group of friends here. Man.. I need to tell you guys about everything I've observed and learned from these people.
- I'll always be looking forward to seeing my old homies whenever time permits us. I'm never online anymore! Hearts for you, kids. <33

oh, and like I said.. living well, is the best revenge. I have no idea why, but this terrible saying will stick with me for a while. Now if you'll excuse me, a one Ms. Ashley Brackins has JUST lost the rest of her sanity to go pick up her head. =)

2/23/2004

Now Playing: death

So as Ashley and I plan yet another all-nighter for one of her insane essays, I conclude:

Nothing is scarier than having both good and evil shake hands. I mean GAH!

2/22/2004

Now Playing: Coldplay - In My Place

Is it a bad thing when you think you're falling for a friend? Must be the weather, the pictures, and my insanity..

Oh, if you think you're fucking this up for me, go fuck yourself. That is if you're not scared of your own touch.

2/21/2004

Now Playing: Jimmy Eat World - Believe In What You Want

Rainy days continue and so does my light mood =D. I had a fuckin great time last night with my peoplez here in the valley, and now that I have time to myself, and alot of time at that.. here is one amazing recent observation:

I'm hell bent on keeping malicious people out of my life from now on. For quite a few reasons, in the past I'd always associate with someone who just wasn't the person to be around. I was reading my psychology book, and it said something that's gonna stick with me for a very long time:

The Signal Detection Theory: "SDT" is an explanatory framework for understanding how decisions are made under certain conditions.

For example, [using example names too] lets say "Justine" wants to meet new people. She's going to consider she meets on a scale of ''pleasantness'', and amounts of pleasantness vary. Her judging the quality of pleasantness of people based on limited exposure [say, being at a party with them for a few hours] is to make uncertain decisions.

In uncertain situations, you can only control two things: 1] sensitivity; the amount of overlap between groups, and 2] bias; how high or low her criterion is for determing how plesant someone is at the time.

Of course, in uncertain conditions, some errors and inevitable. In this case, because there is two groups of stimuli [good people and bad people], there are two types of errors. This is where this theory kicked me in the head with goodness:

error #1: based on limited exposure, Justine can miss out on a potential good friend. We'll use "Paul" as an example.
error #2 based on limitied exposure, Justine can start up a friendship with somebody that she SHOULDN'T start one with - "Timothy". baad Justine!

Along with being able to making two kinds of errors, you can also make two kinds of correct decisions based on limited exposure:

"hit": Justine starts up a friendship with a good potential friend - "Brighton". =D This is called a ''hit''
"miss": Justine correctly rejects a bad potential friend - "sTEven". hehehe this is called succeeding in a ''miss''

Man, I love my psychology book even though I never use or open it <33. And so ends my current run of random observations. One final thing: I'm really close to installing The Sims and all it's expansion packs onto my laptop. Anyone have suggestions on who to make, what to make them do, etc etc???

2/17/2004

Now Playing: Marco/Ismael/Christina dying in Resident Evil

why I love my family:

hypersloth13: momma wants me to t3ll you that some prizoners escaped from the prison in riverside and not to come out of ur place

2/16/2004

Now Playing: Beck - Golden Age

For me, the greatest feeling to ever have is the feeling of being with someone. It's hard to imagine how the hell any of us could [and have] lived without being supported by others. Nowadays, I get my love and support from a lot of sources, and I'm usually too scared of sounding cheesy and retarded when it comes to talking about them aloud. But if there's anything I've come to be good at, is knowing who's got your back. Family, for starters..

Thee seXay onE: *smitten
ewaldogeraldo: <3
ewaldogeraldo: bye yo
Thee seXay onE: =)


Matt and Jenny too. You two have nooo idea how good it feels that we're all as good as we were =). Thanks for not only putting up with my past moronities, but for caring about me and having my back. I really love you guys and I hope I can continue to pester you with my hearts and oddities for a long ass time. =D Okay enough for this string of emo-charged posts.. what the hell is coming over me ._. Ah I forgot.. they are.

2/15/2004

Now Playing: Brighton on the fone running through the streets

Alright. I'm gonna talk Brighton's advice [God I love her] and just drop it. It's done with. Just between you and I.

I came to the valley this weekend for pretty much one reason, and that was to talk to you. I'm blocked, you won't listen to others and you're usually thousands of miles away, so how else could I ever talk to you?? She's totally right.. I'm thinking too much over it and if it's all meant to happen, then it will.

But I'm tired. I don't know how many times you've decieved my good intentions with you dude, and it hurts to think that YOU're the one really upset, when this counts the biggest and worst thing you've done to me.

So you know what? I'm not gonna seek you out anymore. No more rings to your home or anything. If it ever occured to you that our friendship was something other than something to cure your boredom, then you know where to find me. The ball once again, is in your court. Benches by the school or not, one day it'll all come back to you.

2/14/2004

Now Playing: Brighton on the telephone

Alright I feel much better. :-) Thanks for waking me up Bright one and making me feel good. I apologize for the emo-spilling last night. Let's chalk it up to being alone at 1am which is never a good thing for someone like me =D. I have so much to do and write about! This is ridiculous.. I'm way too lazy to do anything too 8-)

Now Playing: Spice Girls - 2 Become 1

sigh.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone, make the moment count. I was never really for this ''holiday'', but what the hell. Go out and tell everyone you love them. Make them feel special, and feel that warm gooey feeling all you can.

I need to get something off my chest. I think this year, the holiday got to me. I guess nowadays, I feel lonely =/.. and I listen to the sappy love songs, and I look through the albums and I just feel so sad that I don't have that someone just to.. be with. Sometimes, I just stare out at the smoggy foggy skies and imagine what it'd be like just to hold someone in my arms. To marvel at the sky and take it all in. This song is the worst song in the universe...

I'm really sorry for going depresso about this. It's not like it's a new feeling or anything.. but something I didn't think would dominate my head for a long period of time. As you can see, I'm bad at words, and at alot of things heheheh.. but right now I'm pretty bad at getting this romantic crap out of my head. =[ I have a valentine and I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BRIGHTON!!! But you're hundreds of miles away.. so God help me for getting lousy.

How could I have been so misguided? seriously. I was always too busy with something [or someone, or some people, or the whole high skool class] to do what I really wanted to do deep down. There are definitely things I alwayz thought of, but was [and is, considering my vagueness] too hard to pull out. Misguided.. ever since 10th grade and then I let it slip from between my fingers. Foolish foolish idiotic and just plain sad.. it still kinda hurts.. If ever there was a high school regret.. it'd be this one.

I just can't believe what you did. On my birthday no less. bah need sleep and I'll be fine by tomorrow!!... Happy Valentine's you guys.

2/12/2004

Now Playing: Linkin Park - Hit The Floor

My hotmail is being a bastard and I neeeedddddd to check my mail $%@%^. I love lj screenings that are sent to your email first, and I love those spam msgs that say Hey Luis, grow an extra 76 inches in GIRTH. Stupid fucking hotmail.

Awesome day yesterday. I hung out with Matt Young [!!!!!] all afternoon and it was just... something you can't put into words. Backstory: we met almost 4 years ago.. but never ever hung out because twas impossible. So this was a pretty momentous occasion, surreal in some ways. He's traveled from like 78346836 miles so I really hope he has fun hurr in the Inland Empire [if at ALL possible]. Totally an experience I can't even begin to decipher.

While I waited for him at Starbucks, I wrote. alot. I've been frankly scurred shatless to attempt writing but I was like eh... might as well. Maybe I could get into the habit of it again, who knows. Alls I know is that this new journal [PATRA!] makes me feel sort of weird. I love it and it's leathery and yay but.. nah nevermind. One day I told Glen that when I die, I wanted him to publish everything I ever wrote. I wanna leave some sort of impact on people all the damn time.. so it'd be pretty cool to leave something behind for people to either laugh at and call me a psychopath, or to learn from. Hey.. maybe they can do both.

2/10/2004

Now Playing: The Postal Service - Sleeping In

Don't wake me I plan on sleeping..

There's something tragic and really sad when you sit down and realize that some things are over and done. No more. Still [and Matt doooonnntt get on my case for this], I wish Enza had decided to stay and talk about everything. But hey.. some things aren't supposed to last. When I say that though, it's kinda hard to believe.. because we all think deep inside that if we tried hard enough, we could have anything we wanted for as long as we wanted. She came in the room and asked to talk and I was... calm. I didn't explode when damnit Luis! You had all the right to.. but I didn't.

I looked at her in the eye, and all I could think about was the summer. The rides in the car. The talks. The friendship.. and I guess now it's something I'm supposed to put behind and talk about in the past tense. I hate when I have to do that man. I don't understand - some tell me to finally go berkserk about this HUGE invasion of privacy, but around here, I'm told to pretend that didn't happen, because my suite needs their peace too. Man.. if I would've let out everything I was going insane over.. maybe things would be different.

But I guess that's something I should put in the ''what if'' category. late

2/05/2004

Now Playing: The Beatles - Let It Be

days around here just get ... better. Yeah, nothing is left without imperfections, drama, or just flat out absurdity... but that's life and I'm enjoying it right now. I make new friends everyday, a lot of them.. I see those I want to see, I talk to those I wanna talk to [for the most part hehe] and I dunno. I guess I'm not supposed to be this jovial when one friend is mad at me and we haven't been able to talk it out. Hopefully.. this will change. I have a great roommate, I have a great suite full of good guys, my building is full of chaos and life, and I have good friends all around.. here far away any and everywhere. If I were to complain then I'd look like a total jackass.

It's krazy! You never think about how you're "growing up" until you've actually grown up some. Lately I'm having serious thoughts about how time is just speeding by, and every day that goes by, we [I] just keep moving forward. I'm not the emotional cripple I was before 11th grade anymore, nor am I the emotional WRECK I was a few years ago. Nowadays I don't go looking for people to help me, for people to put on a pedestal and cling onto.. and while I miss those I used to see or be with from time to time.. it's not something to hinder me from enjoying college life in the now.

Ironic, but as great and momentous as my old high school memories are.. they're not something I wanna keep digging up. It's over. done. Take what you learn and MOVE people MOVE, GO. On my way.. all I'll be needing is my NEW journal, some tunes, and my closest friends in my heart. I realized how hard it is to bargain shop today, jeebus.. this growing up stuff never was that fun when it made me do things I wasn't used to. :-) I learn new things everyday and everyday I feel smarter and more understanding of ... everything. This is gonna cause me serrrrious ego problems if I don't stop >.<. Luckily though, I have friends that care enough to slap the ego right out of me. hahaha.. especially Matt. nite.

2/02/2004

Now Playing: Linkin Park - Krwlng [Reanimation]

O my GOD. Influx of good feelings. This is way too weird..

Everyone visit Molly's new blog!!!!!! She's HAWT! Ah. And to reiterate a point for myself, yes.. I have the best roommate in the world. But it's not like we're surpassing a 5 on this new scale he's thought up. hahaha. I usually don't post virtual nonsense twice in a row... but eh. It's rainy and it gets me wayyyy too giddy.

PSYKDELIC CHIK: luis
PSYKDELIC CHIK: lol
PSYKDELIC CHIK: remember how we would talk about my boobs all the time
PSYKDELIC CHIK: well its the same here
Thee seXay onE: hahahaha
Thee seXay onE: wtf

2/01/2004

Now Playing: Yasunori Mitsuda - Home Aruni

New link. Glen I sure hope you're not busy this afternoon.. but yeah. Hey guys I learned how to hax0r/get arcade games and play them on the laptop.. Street Fighter Alpha 3 makes me go ^______^. Find me for details and such. OH, and the greatest news of this week.. I got my paycheck! bout damn time. Enough for filler update. late