Now Playing: Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody

It's about damn time I actually put in a song when I blog neh?

There is far too much going on in the head to really be like, hey I should talk about it all now. Besides, I don't much feel like it right now!

I need to note this down for myself. Any of you captive audience members are free to read away.

Alrighty... how do you do this again?

So this past week has been rather revealing for me. This past.. Tuesday? Thursday? Johnathan (relatively new friend, very cool) and I were walking out of Phil138. I had just been called an agent casualist by Prof. Nelson and I felt like discussing crap with John as we walk out. We always discuss philosophy stuff. I like it alot too since most other phil kids are, in a word, revolting.

Anyway we were walking through the outskirts of Watkins headed toward the street behind Olmsted when we bump into Lydia. We all had Asian Philosophy together and we started talkin, trying to see when we could get together.

Then Rachel bumps into all three of us. And now I'm like whoa, PEOPLE AT THE SAME TIME. Keep this moment that occured in my head in mind.

So I was like whoa, people. Forgot what it was like to be around big groups of people. I have lab meetings and all, but the social thing has really been lacking for me lately. So to see even 3 of my friends in one place at one time was really.. nice? I decided we're all gonna get together soon, and then we all run away.

Alright.

Had lunch with Jen and Sean on friday. These two are real good buddies and we're all psycholinguistics RAs together. Having lunch together gave me that same 'ahh, people' feeling. I really had a nice time.. and I sensed a big pattern I had neglected. Shoulda noticed this when I started Hatha Yoga last week. Went with my Maliha and Samia, and w/ Jen this past wednesday, and I kinnnnda felt it there too.. and when I hang out with Meghann, I just wanna go <333.. and the other day, the fellas and I played Risk for no good reason, except to delay me from homework (oh, and you will pay for that too Joey >:O).. and ahhh

so big finale: tonight I'm just chillin, all trashed, and I get on facebook and AIM. I started lookin through my friends' profiles. Through peoples blogs they have linked on IM and everywhere else. I realized after a while that wow, some of these kids are super interesting, super awesome, and circumstances have brought us all back to UCR for some damn good reason (and no, units isn't one of those..).. I feel I am meant to hang out with them all!

There is quite a few people I would like to commit hangage with, and frankly, get to know alot better. There's Yalie, whom is this super amazing mysterious woman I lived around @ IV. There is Don, who is... probably the most extroverted man on earth, and it makes me JEALOUS! And then there's Vinnie Burns (cmon, had to type out the last name there), who by all appearances, is the coolest kid on the list in my head of kids I find cool.. and yeah. Bam. Realization (and if you didn't figure it out, you're not a psych major):

I'm just a lowly extrovert looking for what he wants when it comes down to it. I just wanna be part of a gang (no.. not that kind..not again)! My first two years at UCR, I flourished into this madman of outgoingness, and it was freakin' awesome. Best years of my life, just talkin and seein and being with other kids. I'm sure gonna miss this once it's all over and we all move on from Riverside.. so something has to be done

Granted times have not been too cheery for me lately, but these little glimmers of hope just make me want to take control back. I really really do miss hanging wih my psyclique.. but since that appears to be not an option for me, I am going to make options for myself. Yea, maybe the fact that things have been crummy has made me seek out other people to ride out the rest of this with - but what's the harm in that? Can't I just wanna enjoy my last year here in Riverside?

Regardless.. the universe has nooo idea what I am capable of..