Now Playing: Sigur Ros - Vidrar Vel Til Loftarasa

The journey led us all to split up, and find the right way there. Cuz and I decided to try the steeper pass, stepping through dangerous muddy terrain. Izzy went the other way. It was pretty astounding, how high up we were from him, and how far away we were from one another at that moment.



"You're going the wrong way!" he'd say, his voice carrying over in a slight delay. Eventually, we met higher up and took a breif look back at where he had been.



I think we all decided to go on this expedition for different reasons. I can't speak for cuz, who for all intents and purposes is the person most like and most different from me in life, or Izzy, who will always follow a code I can never truly deciper. Me.. I needed to get up there. Go all the way up, and not let the height, or the mud, or lack of sun from getting to me. Eventually we were all traveling three completely different paths.



It was amazingly quiet, on the way there. Even as we neared the top, I think we were all absorbing the environment and maybe.. doing a little Petrarching? I don't know. It was hard, but it was alot of fun too. Had to get up there.. had to get up there





Last time, I made all these plans, I wanted so many things, and I didn't make it to where I wanted to be.. with myself, with people, within my life. But that didn't mean I was defeated. I was given a reality check. Now, I became better prepared. I applied myself. I went against the odds, and climbed and climbed until.. I made it. I was sweating, breathing through my mouth, hair in my eyes, and all I could see was grass cover my body, mud on my shoes, until I look up, see cuz smile and run upwards..



oh God. Thank you God. I made it. And it was beautiful, and I could feel myself want to cry.. but I was too excited and enthralled in the moment

This quarter was the busiest quarter of my college career. But I wanted it that way. I may have had to lax on my social life and the parties.. but it was worth it. I became so much.. more, this quarter. I'm a STAFF alternate. An Emerging Leader. ASPB volunteer. A little older, not sure about wiser, but more experienced. My relationships, or those most important to me, began to blossom. I fell for a girl and got crushed, and it sucked.. but that's really okay. I feel so accomplished up to this point. I made it to where I wanted to be.



The view from here takes me for a spin. I had to tell everyone, call everyone, text everyone, tell them I finally made it! But who knew college kids wouldn't be awake at 9am? I like how this whole entry, much like it's predecessor, has the whole double meaning thing going for it again. haha. In my journal I asked myself, where do I go from here? Is this the end?

No and it shouldn't be. You just keep going. Things will never be simple or have the face validity you wish were true. So you keep going. There's still so much more for me to get to and experience, this can't be the end. Hell, cuz went all the way to the top peak of Box Springs Mountain, she SHOWED ME there's more to go. I like where I am, atop this hill of successes and failures. But I can't stop here. So off I go, back down. I'll be back someday.

Thank goodness though, I know I will never be alone, when I go off to explore the scary infinite.