3/02/2003

Well these past few days have been really mentally exhausting.. I need to fucking relax and let things come to me sometimes. I'm just so concerned about what's in his head lately.. it's taking a toll on me since I care about how he feels ya know? Never been there so... it's weird. Bleh, the things I go through for friends.. whatev, everything turns out worth it in the end, I hope.

This month seems like it's gonna be a very emotionally driven month, as we all get our letters of acceptance/rejection from the colleges. I've had the weirdest bad mood these past few days, and just hearing about from colleges can make or break my state of mind. With that said haha... I GOT INTO UC SANTA CRUZ! It really lifted up my morale. Peter got into RIVERSIDE!!! Matt into both!!! ahhh... man I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm so clueless about everything.

I need to do alot of scholarship work. I don't want to, and I don't wanna do it alone either.. hmmm. I'm very topsy turvy lately, I feel so many emotions these days, sometimes I ask God, what happened to the Luis that felt nothing... bah, not showing emotions is fucking stupid, good riddance to the old me. heh. I need motivation these days, inspiration, I hope I get through this month... I hope we ALL do. BLAH, and I asked myself earlier... who will actually stay in contact with me after high skool? I'm gonna think positive, and say about 6, or 5. Damnit. This month is krazy already. I wish I was in art... then we could hang out.

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