Where to start ... where to finish? I guess first thing would be exactly where my mind is right now, yeh =T. I had a very long discussion with a gooood friend of mine, she is thaBEST, heh. After a few days of a VERY intimidating situation (me being a sexist male, fah), we finally let the steam settle and blow away and we sat down for well over 30 minutes and talked from both sides of our story. It tore me up really, as good as it was. Just the notion of what I actually DO to people makes me feel like such a cold hearted soul, so bad ... could I really cause so much harm to those I hold closest to me?

Apparently I could and I needed to hear it in a more layed out way other than being punched and cussed at. =[ I'm glad things were settled but damn ... I have ALOT of self examination to do, moreso than I've already done. Days can be dull and they can be interesting, sadly for me, they're the worst cases of both. Damn, I hope ... no, I wonder ... how tommorow will be, since well, it's back to before, with certain things coming back all at once in front of me. bleh.. I think that as one month is left for school, I have to step up into high gear ... what do I want to do with myself? What do I want to do with my friends? I'm not spending the summer alone, that's one sure thing.

Well...I hope it's a sure thing. Bah, I'm learning here, as much as I hate it ... time time time, time is the key ...fucking time.