i'm so devious.

do i really manipulate people so much that they don't even expect me to care for them? i'm a spritual/emotional/physical(massage) "physician". it's like holistic healing. but i'm still disconnected. how does it all work out? am i even content with what i have here? we'll see, i think i should be, but i need not be. if i don't feel anything for people, which i do, tremendously, i'm only deluding them into believe i've helped them, then leave them for another new "project". its not nice, at all. it isn't, it'd boorish, it's so crude. the trust i give to others isn't the same degree, despite the fact that the issues are the same.


how does that happen?

*sigh* You're too good at this self knowing stuff. Maybe that's what I saw in you that I used to have. Damnit. I'm going to edit this later. mannnnnnnn I don't like this old road I'm in. Just for thou though, this is alll for me and for thoooouuuuuuu. Now, Before Zodin yells at me, no.

Read the last entry I made, the longer one, READ IT OVER AND OVERRRRRRRR, and than go sulk to My December just like me. I may not use blogs for personal shit but I actually used it for so in the last few entries, READ~! and no Zodin, this isn't a cry for attention, go suck on a Hulk Hogan iceycle ;-). Ugh.... I need Peter, where is he....ARGH